From Costaricacurious.com – In my former working life, among many other things, I managed a sales team; over the years it was interesting how the title of the sales position changed…modifying it from Sales Guy to a word that had no correlation to the word “Sales” at all.
The title progression went something like; “salesman” to “sales representative” to “account manager”, then “account executive” and finally, about a year before I left, if asked what they did, the sales guy would say he was in, “Business Development”.
Each iteration distancing itself further from reality that they were sales people, there to sell you our service.
Since moving to Costa Rica I have seen the same clever use of words, used to hide the truth. They may be oxymoronic, misnomers or just terms used in order to put a little lipstick on the pig.
Caja Rápido (life in the fast lane?)
This term is both a misnomer as well as an oxymoron. Caja is the Spanish term meaning, among other things, cashier and Rápido is the Spanish term meaning quick or fast.
So, Caja + Rápido = The Fast Lane.
To be clear, nothing having to do with a cashier in Costa Rica is fast. There are many things that may slow you down: a suspicious colone, a barcode that is not in the system, a conversation the cashier is having or, especially in the case of the Caja Rápido line, a customer with about 200 items in their shopping cart.
In the States, the “Express Lane” almost always has a sign dictating the maximum number of items you can have in order to participate in the Expressness of the lane. There is no such precision for the Caja Rápido lane in Costa Rica.
The lane acts much as the Stop Sign in Costa Rica – a suggestion – a suggestion to limit the number of items in your cart; a suggestion that no one follows and a suggestion that makes the sign designating the registers quickness unnecessary. We are learning, not just at the grocery store, that things take time. It is ok. Slow down. Relax. Pura Vida.
No Hay Problema.
Solar Dryer
This name Solar Dryer is just a joke, really. Because of the high cost of electricity many people do not have, or use, an electric dryer for their clothes.
Instead they use a solar dryer, the sun, and lay their clothes on all manner of a clothesline: railings, bushes, roof overhangs, the sidewalk – really just about anywhere the sun might hit.
We purchased a stackable washer/dryer unit and we rarely use the dryer; when we do, we see it reflected in our electric bill.
I was unsure about using the Solar Dryer at first, but after seeing and feeling the result, I am happy with it.
No Hay Problema.
The Green Season
Green Season – a marketing way of saying, “Rainy Season”. In all fairness, the rainy season does make things green and lush and gorgeous.
However, I am thinking the term Green Season most likely originated with the Costa Rican Tourism Board. I have no proof, mind you, that this is the case.
I do, however know that tourism drops off mightily during the rainy season because tourists are afraid they might melt.
Rainy…ehr…The Green Season runs roughly from the end of April to mid November. We just endured our first Rainy Season, and by endured I mean we operated our lives exactly the same as if it were the Tourist Seas…. I mean the Dry Season.
Most mornings during the Rainy Season start out sunny, cool and beautiful. The rain then finds us mid-afternoon and stays for an hour or two, then the skies clear again. So, you bring an umbrella with you when you go out and occasionally you modify your plans a bit.
No Hay Problema.
Joyeria
Joyeria is the Spanish word for Jewelry Store.
There is no Joy found here.
Hot Water on Demand
As opposed to its much more notorious name – Suicide Shower – hot water on demand sounds pleasant, even customer service oriented. Hot Water on Demand is a very accurate term though.
The water is not hot until it hits the shower head. Once at the showerhead the water is heated electrically. That is right, oil and water might not mix but electricity and water, in Costa Rica, DO. Electrical wires run to the shower-head providing you with the luxury of the hot water you desperately desire.
Although an awful idea, the suicide shower is ubiquitous in Costa Rica and, actually safe***. I have used Hot Water on Demand devices several times without too much damage.
Fried
*** I am not an attorney, electrician, nor am I a plumber…Also, I have no money.
Hasta Pronto,
Greg (Gregorio, Intentionally Unemployed at 41 and living in Costa Rica)
Greg – And you thought that things would be completely different in “paradise.” Doublespeak is not unique to the US, although it has been elevated to a fine art there.
In all fairness, “fast lanes” in US stores are often just as bad as they are here. Despite signs, “fast lanes” are often used in US stores by people with more than the stated number of items, sometimes rationalized by dividing the number of items by the number in their party that includes three rug rats who have terrorized everyone in the store during shopping, and sometimes just because the person using it thinks that the rules apply only to everyone else. Then, of course, they might want to use a credit card or write a check in the cash-only line. Additionally, the US fast lanes are generally staffed by the most challenged cashiers, who can manage to screw up even scanning bar codes and make ten items take longer than 200 in another line.
As for the “green season”, the validity of your conclusions probably depends a lot on where you are. If you are in Guanacaste, it probably holds up. In the Central Valley, the first few months of the rainy season are as described, but it can rain all day long for days on end in September or October. Also, roads and bridges can collapse or be covered by mudslides, seriously compromising one’s ability to get from point “A” to point “B” and causing significant changes of plans. Ironically, there is a perpetual green season on the Caribbean side, although they generally have their driest period when the rains are worst in the rest of the country.